cranberry sauce

because you asked...

1 (16-oz) bag of fresh cranberries

1 c. water

1 c. sugar

1 c. chopped walnuts or pecans

1 apple, chopped

1/4 cup Grand Marnier

1 orange

1 tsp. cinnamon

1 tsp. nutmeg

rinse the cranberries in a colander and throw them into a large saucepan. add the 1 cup water and 1 cup sugar. turn on med-low and start simmering.

meanwhile, chop the apple and throw in with the cranberries. then take the orange and get a good tablespoons of zest off it and throw the zest in the saucepan, too. then cut the orange in half, juice it, and add the juice to the pan. finally, add the walnuts, cinnamon, nutmeg, and Grand Marnier.

once all ingredients are added, simmer for a total of about 15 more minutes, being careful not to let the bottom of the pan scorch due to the high sugar content of the dish. the sauce will be finished when the cranberries have released their red color and have "popped"/collapsed and the apples have soaked up some of the red.

pour into a glass Pyrex bowl and cover. let chill overnight - this is definitely a make-ahead dish. the pectin released from the cranberries in the boiling process will set as it chills, so don't worry if it's a little runny when you take it off the stove.

this makes enough for two Thanksgiving dinners, or one me. when ready to serve, spoon into a pretty glass dish, still slightly chilled.

cranberries are great sources of antioxidants and vitamin c. for the record, i didn't even google that. like most berries, they also freeze very well - so take advantage of the after-thanksgiving clearance at your grocery store. buy a few bags and throw them directly into your freezer. then when you're craving them in march, you can open the bag and dump it directly into the colander to rinse.

speaking of rinsing, i've started using a vegetable wash and i really like it. especially for fruits like berries and apples where we eat the peel, it does a good job of removing wax and pesticides (i'm not so worried about dirt or germs). it's reasonably priced and i've started spraying down every bunch of grapes, rinsing them, then just storing them in a paper-towel-lined colander in the fridge. seems to work well, and they don't go bad because they've been forgotten in a refrigerator drawer.

happy thanksgiving!

shepherd's pie

this is a thursday night recipe, when it's toward the end of the week and you have a bunch of leftover vegetables in tupperware in your fridge that won't be touched over the weekend.  it's also very inexpensive and uses ingredients that are already in your cupboard.

jake glanced at my laptop when i was creating this post and asked why i had pictures of dinner pulled up.  i told him that sometimes i post recipes.  he was all "why?  do people want them?" and i was all "i dunno but it's my blog and i'll post pictures of our dinner if i want to" and he was all "if you're going to post recipes why don't you post them of something good like your spicy roasted vegetables not like something plain that anyone can make" and i was all "that's a backhanded comment i've never heard you complain about my shepherd's pie and i've never seen you make it either" and he was all like "whatever" and i was all like "whatever" and he continued into the kitchen to refill his glass of iced tea and i hit "publish post."

ingredients

1-2 lbs ground hamburger or turkey

1/2 onion, chopped

1 clove garlic, minced

2 tsp. beef bullion granules or 1 beef bullion cube, dissolved in 1/2 cup water

4 cups instant mashed potatoes, prepared according to directions

cheese

paprika

seasoning salt

garlic powder

pepper

vegetables*

*you can use any veggies that you have in the fridge.  really, anything goes.  corn, carrots, broccoli, zucchini, squash, peas, cooked, uncooked, anything.  if you don't have any veggies sitting around, add two cups of frozen mixed vegetables.

directions

brown the ground hamburger or turkey in your largest nonstick skillet, along with the onion and garlic.  drain grease and return to pan.  add beef bullion and a dash each of garlic powder, pepper, and seasoning salt to taste.  add veggies and stir to combine.

here we have corn, carrots, green beans, and zucchini.

while the ground hamburger or turkey are browning, mix up your instant mashed potatoes.  add an extra dash of garlic powder for good measure, and don't skimp on the butter.  you can always boil potatoes and make real mashed potatoes, but this is thursday night and who wants to mess with that on a thursday night not me i have laundry to fold and aislinn just dumped an entire package of bendy straws onto the floor.

oh, i forgot.  pretend i already told you to preheat your oven to 350.

now spread the meat and veggie mixture into a casserole dish:

and spread the mashed potatoes over the top:

then sprinkle a little cheese on the top, and dust with paprika:

throw it in the oven and bake for 20-30 minutes, until the cheese is melted on top and everything is bubbly.

mmmmmmm.  serve with salad and crusty bread spread with butter and jam.

delicious.

strawberry champagne salad

J's mom makes this amazing salad based on a recipe from charleston's restaurant.  the original version has a champagne dressing, hence the name.  the other weekend i got the recipe from her, and now i'm sharing it with you, now that strawberries are in season.  it's wonderful.

salad:

• bag of lettuce (i like the "butter blend," or romaine)
• 6 strawberries, rinsed and diced
• 4 dates, pitted and diced
• 10 cherry or grape tomatoes, halved
• 1/4 cup toasted pecans or walnuts
• gorgonzola cheese, crumbled
  
• optional: 1/4 to 1/2 cup fresh chopped pineapple

dressing:

• 1/4 cup brown sugar
• 1/4 cup apple cider vinegar
• 1 tsp chicken bouillon granules (or 1 cube)
• cracked pepper
• dash olive oil

whisk dressing ingredients together until brown sugar is dissolved, then toss with lettuce.  add remaining ingredients to top of lettuce and chill.  serve.

***

if chocolate is the answer, the question is irrelevant

sometimes, you need a chocolate cake in your life.  not because it's anyone's birthday, or a holiday, or any other reason.  

thus was Princess's opinion yesterday evening.

and who am i to deny a child chocolate?  the importance of chocolate has been deeply ingrained in me since birth by my mother, who has been battling a serious hershey-bar-a-day addiction since 1977.  and she's still thinner than me.  *shakes fist at the sky*

she fed us hershey's for breakfast on standardized test days because she read that chocolate improves mental acuity.  hey, worked for me!

anyway.

that says "Happy Friday," not "7APQY PNIDAY." 

my cooking is hearty and rustic;

my detailed icing skills are less than stellar.

i'm more paula deen than barefoot contessa, and you know what?  i'm okay with that.

and NOW i will share with you, my few faithful readers, my family's generations-old, top-secret recipe for chocolate cake from scratch.

this recipe is so simple, and yields such amazing results, that i promise you will never bake another chocolate cake from a box.

GRANNY'S SOUR CREAM CHOCOLATE CAKE

("Granny" was my great grandmother - my mother's mother's mother.  I think she'd be okay that I'm sharing this recipe with you, but don't tell the ladies down at the First Christian Church because it's possible she never shared it with them.)

INGREDIENTS FOR CAKE:

2 cups flour                                  1.25 t. baking soda

2 cups sugar                                 0.5 t. baking powder

1 cup water                                   1.0 t. salt

3/4 cup full fat sour cream        1.0 t. vanilla

1/4 cup shortening                      2 eggs

2 heaping T. cocoa powder (i consider "heaping" an understatement)

dump it all in a bowl in whatever order.  mix well.  pour into a greased-and-floured (really even that step is optional) sheet cake pan.  bake at 350' for 35 minutes.

INGREDIENTS FOR ICING:

1/3 cup softened butter               3 cups powdered sugar (approx. 1 box)

2 heaping T. cocoa powder       1/2 cup full fat sour cream

2 t. vanilla

dump in a bowl.  mix well.  ice cake.

let the cake cool before you ice it or the icing will melt on the cake and be too runny, not set up right.  but i find that if you let the cake cool for about 10 minutes while you're assembling your ingredients and then throw it in the fridge while you actually make the icing--even though i'm sure you're not supposed to put a hot sheet cake pan directly onto a tempered glass shelf in the fridge (although i've avoided disaster so far [but it reminds me of one time when my mom was making gravy from roast drippings in a pyrex dish on the stovetop which is supposed to be okay and the pyrex dish EXPLODED and if that happened inside my refrigerator--nooooes!]) then the cake will probably be cool enough to ice.

***

and then, because it's friday and we've made a cake for no reason,

sometimes it's okay to set the warm cake on the coffee table and eat it straight out of the pan.

sometimes.

(did i tell you J cut his hair?)

Princess looks a little like a black mamba with all that chocolate in her mouth and missing teeth.

"i have to brush my teeth GOOD tonight!"  -Princess

happy [chocolate] fridays!

chicken parmesan pasta

the cast of characters:

3-4 boneless chicken breasts

1 cup unseasoned bread crumbs

1/2 cup flour

1 egg

1/4-1/2 cup chopped red onion

2-3 cloves chopped garlic

olive oil

1/4 cup milk

1/2 cup grated parmesan cheese

1/2 package bowtie pasta

28-oz can crushed tomatoes

bay leaf

dried basil, oregano, tarragon, rosemary, parsley, sage - whatever you've got.  even some generic-named "italian seasoning" will work.

garlic salt

black pepper

salt

the instructions:

start by putting on a pot of salted water to boil for the pasta, but don't add the pasta yet.  i think salting the water is essential to good pasta.

then drizzle some olive oil in a large pan and start heating it up.  

chop up the red onion and the garlic, and throw them in the olive oil to start cooking.

next, start the pasta sauce by pouring the 28oz can of tomato sauce into a large saucepan.

add a WHOLE BUNCH of the dried spices i listed above.  and then add a WHOLE BUNCH MORE.  there's no such thing as too many green herbs in tomato sauce.  especially oregano.  if i could get away with it, i would use oregano in a 1:1 ratio.  in everything.  

  below are the usual suspects in my pasta sauce.  i never bother with pre-made pasta sauce because homemade is so easy and so much better.  pre-made pasta sauce is also FULL of sugar, which is not only bad for you, but i think it also tastes weird and i end up oversalting it to compensate for the sugaryness.  so don't be afraid - add them all.  otherwise you'll end up with bland pasta sauce and you'll go back to ragu and i'll be sad.

dump all the spices into your crushed tomatoes, along with some garlic salt and pepper.  stir.  

by now your onions and garlic have smelled up the house and are nice and translucent, so dump those in, stir again, put a lid on it, and let it simmer.

now, take out a brick of parmesan cheese and grate about thiiiiiis much:

(isn't it cool how my cutting board  is designed to fit inside the rim of my sink? uber handy.)

leave the parmesan for a minute (if you can - hands off!) and add your bowtie pasta to the water, which should be boiling nicely by now.

then take out your chicken breasts (thawed, of course).  

beat them until they're about 1/4" thick and cut them up into quick-cooking cutlets. 

(the parmesan breading will cook quickly so to avoid overbrowning, 

you need thin cuts of chicken that will also cook quickly.)

breading the chicken goes in three steps.

Step 1: dredge the chicken in flour that has pepper and garlic salt stirred into it.

don't skip this step or the bread crumbs won't stick 

to your chicken and you'll end up with a mess in the pan.

Step 2:  now dredge the chicken in a mixture of the egg and milk 

that have been whisked together with a fork:

(yeah, i know my bowl is chipped.  i love these bowls.)

Step 3:  dredge the chicken in the breadcrumb/parmesan mixture.

to make the breadcrumb/parmesan mixture, combine the breadcrumbs, most of the parmesan that you grated a minute ago, and some more herbs (i used tarragon, oregano, and basil).

after you dredge the chicken in each of the three mixtures above, 

your fingers will look like this:

resist the urge to lick your fingers.  they're covered with raw chicken juice.  gross!

(one time Princess was "helping" me cook dinner when she was about 4 1/2, and curious about the raw chicken i had set on the countertop, she stuck her finger out, ran it over the chicken, and stuck her finger in her mouth before i could say, "nooooooO!"  she survived.)

anyway, stick each piece of chicken in the pan you used earlier to cook the onion and garlic.  no need to wash it out.  although you should add some more olive oil before you add the chicken.

cook for about 6 minutes per side?  that's phrased as a question because i really can't remember how long i cooked them.  long enough for the breading to get well browned.  DON'T MESS WITH IT TOO MUCH OR THE BREADING WILL COME OFF IN THE PAN, and then you'll have to eat the cheesy bits of fried breading out of the bottom of the pan later and everyone knows that's just a tragedy.  ahem.

while the chicken is cooking, go out to the makeshift herb table designed to keep the animals out of the plants.  (do you ever notice how many shots i have that include the back of the dog's head?  it's because she always has to be one step ahead of me, whatever i'm doing.)

pinch off 2 or 3 basil leaves, come back in, and chop 'em up.  

(that's the reserved bit of parmesan from earlier.)

by now you should've flipped your chicken and it should be almost done.

(i did mine in two batches.)

so take your pasta off the stove, drain, and toss with olive oil 

to keep it from getting all sticky-gummy.

put some pasta in a dish, pour some sauce over it, lay a piece of chicken on top, 

and garnish with parmesan and fresh basil.

if yours doesn't come out looking like ^that^ then, dude, i don't know what to tell you.  call me.

serve with a big glass of sweet tea because it doesn't matter 

what genre of cuisine we're cooking, 

we're still in oklahoma.

the weekend edition

this morning at 7:30 a.m. i was greeted by a 5-year-old in ladybug pajamas, wings, and a tiara:

(please ignore the Bad Dog in the foreground. actually, she's been better lately, but she's still on my D list.) we all got up and made blueberry pancakes and bacon (or at least i did while they danced around the house to van morrison's "astral weeks"). J likes his pancakes with syrup and peanut butter. i'm a purist - butter and syrup only, please. Princess likes them full-on loaded the way that my stepdad taught her - butter, peanut butter, syrup, and bananas.

after such a ridiculous breakfast, i made a light dinner tonight. i'm SO into spring food right now it's ridiculous. here i made a salad with lettuce, walnuts, feta cheese, strawberries, and purple onion, served in my great-grandmother's milk glass bowl:

freaking YUM. strawberries always remind me of my aunt patti. i used to go visit my cousins amber and jessie every summer as a kid (they were older and i totally idolized them). aunt patti ALWAYS had this amazing strawberry shampoo that we NEVER had at home, and her long, long blonde hair always smelled of it. it was like the most decadent shampoo ever created - i wanted to SWIM in it. she also cans the most amazing strawberry jam. not to mention that all these impressions were made on me during the height of my strawberry shortcake obsession, and as a result, i can never eat a strawberry without thinking of aunt patti.

i digress. tonight i also threw together this pasta salad. i'll post the recipe below - it was great.

i served the salads with some sandwiches. in our house, this means setting out a big hunk of unsliced peppered turkey breast on a cutting board, two or three kinds of bread/rolls (today we had sesame seed hoagie buns and onion rolls, plus good old home pride wheat for Princess), and a couple of kinds of sliced cheese, plus sliced tomato, sliced onion, and lettuce. also set out are pickles, pickled okra, pickled tomatoes, whatever, and all of the sandwich accoutrement that i have in the fridge (dijon & yellow mustards and miracle whip, usually). then everyone figures it out on their own.

after dinner J worked some more with Princess, who is learning how to ride her bike without the training wheels. scary stuff.

do you SEE all that padding? granted, she's going to bed tonight completely and utterly unscathed which i'm happy about, but i have yet to see a bruise, scrape, or scab on that child that even approaches the monstrosities that covered my legs when i was a child. the 80s were dangerous, man. not a knee pad or a helmet to be had, and we had to learn how to ride our bikes going uphill both ways and wearing NEON. tsk tsk. hard times.

Margaret's Saturday Pasta Salad

• 1 small jar or can artichoke hearts, drained and rinsed (the artichoke hearts, that is, not the jar or can)
• 1/2 small can chopped black olives (i used the other 1/2 of the olives to spread on my sandwich with some dijon mustard and a little miracle whip for a sort of olive spread - yum)
• 1 small jar alessi pesto sauce (i was going to make my own, but discovered that the local grocery store carries pine nuts but NOT fresh basil. what??)
• 1 package cherry tomatoes, halved or quartered (whatever you feel like, man)
• 1/2 package bow tie pasta, boiled in well-salted water
• 2-3 tablespoons minced garlic (optional)
• squeeze of fresh lemon juice (optional)
• 1 small package feta cheese
• a brick of parmesan for garnish (do not even bother with the stuff in the green can. that's fine for pizza, but keep it far away from my pasta salad recipe, kthnxbai.)

combine all in a bowl except the parmesan. real parmesan cheese is my FAVORITE cheese, but you don't need to know that for this recipe so if you're writing this down, skip this part. chill 1 hour to overnight. if you're going to use the whole bag of pasta, then double everything else, because no one likes bland pasta salad. you have to use plenty of garlicky pesto to give it kick.

when ready to serve, pull out your potato peeler and run it over the edge of your brick of parmesan to make some nice cheesy curls on top, and also maybe a little cracked black pepper.

irish stew and more

here is a picture of the irish stew that i made for dinner tonight.

the glass of guinness belonged to J. if any of the pregnancy police are reading this, rest assured that i borrowed it for illustrative purposes only. and if you read all the way to the end of this post, i will reward you with the recipe, which i pretty much made up on the spot based upon a very overly complicated recipe and what would cook really quickly, because really, who has time to simmer an irish stew for four hours on a monday night? but it turned out GREAT.

and here you will see a picture of the rosemary plant that i bought to use to make tea. it's huge. rosemary's not a bad cooking herb, either. great for roasting meat. also, i like to use it in spicy roasted nuts at christmastime. i had planned to buy a much smaller plant, but i walked into wild-oats-soon-to-be-whole-foods and right there at the entrance was a big display of christmas-tree-shaped rosemary plants leftover from the holidays, on sale. it doesn't get any easier than that.

and here you will see a picture of the menthol crystals that i got at the peace of mind bookstore on saturday. they look like something very, very illegal, but i assure you, they're not. this one-ounce bag cost about four dollars. you can click on the pictures for larger views.

and finally, here you will see how the menthol crystals work. you take a tiny little piece and put it into a mug of steaming water, and then you inhale the steam aromatherapy-like. it's like vicks vapo-rub times ten billion. it's amazing what it does to clear up your sinuses.

bonus points to anyone who can identify the mug. without googling it.

now, for the recipe.

Super-Quick-Like Irish Stew

1 package ready-made roast beef (see picture)

1/2 large white onion, chopped

4-5 large carrots, roughly chopped

2-3 large potatoes, roughly chopped

1 individual-serving-size bottle red wine (see picture, except that's obviously not a red wine)

1/2 of a can of Guinness

1 small can tomato paste

1 can beef broth

a big glass of hot water

1 big pinch sugar

1 tablespoon dried thyme

2 dashes ground sage

5-6 big dashes worchestershire

1 clove garlic, smashed and diced

salt & pepper to taste

okay. big stock pot. pour in the can of beef broth and a big glass of hot water and get it boiling on high. then peel the carrots and potatoes, chop them up, and throw them in and get them cooking. follow with the onion and garlic. once it's boiling, reduce heat to medium-high.

add the little bottle of red wine (i used merlot) and the half can of Guinness. then add the spices and worchestershire and the tomato paste. (the original recipe called for only two tablespoons of tomato paste [along with a bunch of other obscure ingredients and time-consuming tasks, including cooking the beef in butter and simmering for hours on end. i mean really, do you think the rural irish were garnishing their soup with chopped fresh parsley and ground coriander?], but then what do you do with the rest of the can? i use tomato paste like once a month, so to use it two tablespoons at a time is a huge waste of the rest of the can. so i throw it all in.)

bring back up to a boil and then add the whole package of beef, gravy included, and simmer until it reduces by an inch or two (about 10 minutes - long enough to make some biscuits and get them in the oven. as you can tell, cooking is far from an exact science with me). speaking of which, the original recipe called for a bay leaf, too, but i was out. so you could throw one or two of those in there, if you were so inclined. oh, and also add some salt and pepper.

serve with irish soda bread and a mug of Guinness. or, if you're pregnant, organic apple juice.