chicken parmesan pasta

the cast of characters:

3-4 boneless chicken breasts

1 cup unseasoned bread crumbs

1/2 cup flour

1 egg

1/4-1/2 cup chopped red onion

2-3 cloves chopped garlic

olive oil

1/4 cup milk

1/2 cup grated parmesan cheese

1/2 package bowtie pasta

28-oz can crushed tomatoes

bay leaf

dried basil, oregano, tarragon, rosemary, parsley, sage - whatever you've got.  even some generic-named "italian seasoning" will work.

garlic salt

black pepper

salt

the instructions:

start by putting on a pot of salted water to boil for the pasta, but don't add the pasta yet.  i think salting the water is essential to good pasta.

then drizzle some olive oil in a large pan and start heating it up.  

chop up the red onion and the garlic, and throw them in the olive oil to start cooking.

next, start the pasta sauce by pouring the 28oz can of tomato sauce into a large saucepan.

add a WHOLE BUNCH of the dried spices i listed above.  and then add a WHOLE BUNCH MORE.  there's no such thing as too many green herbs in tomato sauce.  especially oregano.  if i could get away with it, i would use oregano in a 1:1 ratio.  in everything.  

  below are the usual suspects in my pasta sauce.  i never bother with pre-made pasta sauce because homemade is so easy and so much better.  pre-made pasta sauce is also FULL of sugar, which is not only bad for you, but i think it also tastes weird and i end up oversalting it to compensate for the sugaryness.  so don't be afraid - add them all.  otherwise you'll end up with bland pasta sauce and you'll go back to ragu and i'll be sad.

dump all the spices into your crushed tomatoes, along with some garlic salt and pepper.  stir.  

by now your onions and garlic have smelled up the house and are nice and translucent, so dump those in, stir again, put a lid on it, and let it simmer.

now, take out a brick of parmesan cheese and grate about thiiiiiis much:

(isn't it cool how my cutting board  is designed to fit inside the rim of my sink? uber handy.)

leave the parmesan for a minute (if you can - hands off!) and add your bowtie pasta to the water, which should be boiling nicely by now.

then take out your chicken breasts (thawed, of course).  

beat them until they're about 1/4" thick and cut them up into quick-cooking cutlets. 

(the parmesan breading will cook quickly so to avoid overbrowning, 

you need thin cuts of chicken that will also cook quickly.)

breading the chicken goes in three steps.

Step 1: dredge the chicken in flour that has pepper and garlic salt stirred into it.

don't skip this step or the bread crumbs won't stick 

to your chicken and you'll end up with a mess in the pan.

Step 2:  now dredge the chicken in a mixture of the egg and milk 

that have been whisked together with a fork:

(yeah, i know my bowl is chipped.  i love these bowls.)

Step 3:  dredge the chicken in the breadcrumb/parmesan mixture.

to make the breadcrumb/parmesan mixture, combine the breadcrumbs, most of the parmesan that you grated a minute ago, and some more herbs (i used tarragon, oregano, and basil).

after you dredge the chicken in each of the three mixtures above, 

your fingers will look like this:

resist the urge to lick your fingers.  they're covered with raw chicken juice.  gross!

(one time Princess was "helping" me cook dinner when she was about 4 1/2, and curious about the raw chicken i had set on the countertop, she stuck her finger out, ran it over the chicken, and stuck her finger in her mouth before i could say, "nooooooO!"  she survived.)

anyway, stick each piece of chicken in the pan you used earlier to cook the onion and garlic.  no need to wash it out.  although you should add some more olive oil before you add the chicken.

cook for about 6 minutes per side?  that's phrased as a question because i really can't remember how long i cooked them.  long enough for the breading to get well browned.  DON'T MESS WITH IT TOO MUCH OR THE BREADING WILL COME OFF IN THE PAN, and then you'll have to eat the cheesy bits of fried breading out of the bottom of the pan later and everyone knows that's just a tragedy.  ahem.

while the chicken is cooking, go out to the makeshift herb table designed to keep the animals out of the plants.  (do you ever notice how many shots i have that include the back of the dog's head?  it's because she always has to be one step ahead of me, whatever i'm doing.)

pinch off 2 or 3 basil leaves, come back in, and chop 'em up.  

(that's the reserved bit of parmesan from earlier.)

by now you should've flipped your chicken and it should be almost done.

(i did mine in two batches.)

so take your pasta off the stove, drain, and toss with olive oil 

to keep it from getting all sticky-gummy.

put some pasta in a dish, pour some sauce over it, lay a piece of chicken on top, 

and garnish with parmesan and fresh basil.

if yours doesn't come out looking like ^that^ then, dude, i don't know what to tell you.  call me.

serve with a big glass of sweet tea because it doesn't matter 

what genre of cuisine we're cooking, 

we're still in oklahoma.