leftovers

today J came home from work and made himself a plate of thanksgiving leftovers. he sat it down on the coffee table and returned to the kitchen to get a glass of water - and lo and behold, Kitten followed him and got one of her forks out of her drawer and joined him for a second dinner.

oh hai. can i have some?

these noodles taste better on your plate than they did on mine:

trade me forks:

here, i'll feed you:

now i'll feed me!

daddy is the funniest.

by way of developmental updates: she says, "mama," "dada," "bye-bye," "dog," "kitty," "hi," "baby," "blanket," and "uh-oh" (her favorite). she hates bananas and meat. she loves grapes and green beans. she races up the staircase every time i leave the baby gate down. she is very attached to Lucy, her baby doll, and "flat bear," a--well, a flat stuffed bear. she takes her shoes and socks off as soon as we get into the car and throws them into the floor. she steals my cell phone and says, "hi!" into it, and then runs away shrieking. she refuses to keep any hair bow in her hair - she swats at it like a gnat. she kisses smooshy wet kisses and thinks it's hilarious. she has two teeth (finally!) - the two upper center. she points at everything she wants. she feeds valkyrie when we're not looking. she thinks the word "no" is hilarious, and does not understand when we scold her. tonight she was tossing the sorted mail off the coffee table so fast that i couldn't stop the tornado and considered throwing myself on top of all the papers just to make her stop so i could get it all picked up. she loves somersaults (with assistance from J or Princess).

i could go on and on, but i'm sure i'm boring everyone but me. but it's a nice way to track her milestones, this blog. i wish i did it more often.

fantabulously frugal

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an epidemic of paranoia

i find that these days when i start to feel a little under the weather, instead of slowing down and taking it easy i go into overdrive. am i getting sick? how long will i be out of commission? is the laundry caught up? how many days worth of frozen meals are in the freezer right now? do we have a fresh gallon of milk? should i run to the store on my way home just in case?

***

all this talk about the flu has me doing a lot of thinking. i got my flu shot this year, but i get it every year. i've never talked about it this much. and i've never been afraid of having the flu before. it was just something i wanted to avoid because it would suck.

and i'm not just talking swine flu, i'm talking about ANY flu. i'm officially over it. if we get it, we get it. if we don't, we don't.

and would getting "it" be so bad, anyway? swine flu is here to stay. i expect to be getting H1N1 vaccinations along with my "seasonal" flu vaccine for years to come. if you think about why swine flu is so "scary," it's because we've never been exposed to it before and have no prior immunity. and the best way to build up immunity is - you guessed it - being exposed. natural immunity from having actually gone through the sickness provides better protection against future occurences than any vaccine can. that's straight out of my pediatrician's mouth, and it's one point that he and i agree on.

the swine flu that is going around oklahoma right now is relatively mild. yes, people are dying. yes, it's scary. but the strain that goes around next year might be twice as vicious, so i'm not going to freak out if someone in my immediate family comes down with this year's strain. they'll only be better off when the next round hits, and i'm not counting on any pharmaceutical company to come up with a magic shot for every conceivable strain of swine flu that develops over the next 100 years. might as well start building up that immunity right off the bat.

i mean, don't get me wrong. we'll vaccinate. we'll get those H1N1 shots. we'll do what They tell us that we are Supposed To Do. but i am not going to worry any more about what happens if it doesn't work, because it's not going to do a bit of good.

in the mean time, we wash hands. stick a packet of purell wipes in autumn's lunch box for her to use before she eats her sandwich. teach the girls proper sneezing (into the crook of your arm) habits and ensure that their noses are wiped and their milk glasses aren't shared and their tissues aren't left on the coffee table. in essense, the exact same things i was taught in elementary school.

***

these days, i kiss aislinn's warm, soft little cheek and wonder if i'm communicating some awful sickness to her. and then i think about the survival of the fittest. it can't be a coincidence that humans instictually kiss, touch, and cuddle those who they love most. i have my own little personal theory that we do this as an evolved habit, to share germs and bacteria and viruses (both good and bad) with those who we want to protect so that their (and our) immune systems are exposed to -- and build resistance to -- a plethora of organisms.

otherwise, when i get sick, wouldn't my first instict be to run and kiss my opposing counsel on the cheek?

***

times are scary. avian flu, swine flu, who knows what's next. monkey flu. ebola. it's a small planet and one little cough by mother nature can wipe us all out like so many brontosauri. i refuse to buy into the hype because it is a completely useless expenditure of my emotional energy. instead, i will feed my children oranges instead of orange flavored things, kiss them goodnight, and enjoy the time we have together.

we have learned how to throw tantrums

i take away a wet wipe because she's trying to eat it. she sits down with her legs sticking out, bends completely over and puts her forehead and palms flat on the floor, and SCREAMS. if i try to pick her up she wrestles out of my arms and then scurries quickly over to the other side of the room so she can lay down and repeat the scene uninterrupted.

she also refuses to be put in her car seat now.

as soon as i lift her toward the car she goes stiff as a board. so i have to wrestle her into the seat, and then she goes limp and slides her bottom all the way down so her head is on the bottom of the seat and refuses to sit up. and then while i try to prop her up all loosey goosey and put her arms through the straps, she tries to roll over onto the bench seat out of her car seat using her feet against the seat as leverage against me.

she only does this to me.

H1N1 Vaccine

for all you parents who are struggling with the decision about whether to vaccinate yourself and your child with the new H1N1 vaccine that is becoming available, i'd encourage you to take a look at this article on dr. sears' website.

dr. sears has written extensively on parenting issues, and he is my "go-to" reference for most parenting issues. i have relied on his book "The Vaccine Book" in making decisions to stagger kitten's vaccination schedule and how exactly to do so.

i also use his reference book, "The Baby Book" as my everything child-rearing reference guide. along with google, of course. ;)

dr. sears coined the phrase "attachment parenting," ("AP") and i am mostly AP parent. without going extensively into what AP is, here's the wikipedia article. my friend maria also practices AP and blogs about her experiences.

from wikipedia:

***

Per Dr. Sears' theory of attachment parenting (AP), proponents such as the API attempt to foster a secure bond with their children by promoting eight principles which are identified as goals for parents to strive for. These eight principles are:

1. Preparation for Pregnancy, Birth and Parenting
2. Feed with Love and Respect
3. Respond with Sensitivity
4. Use Nurturing Touch
5. Ensure Safe Sleep, Physically and Emotionally
6. Provide Consistent Loving Care
7. Practice Positive Discipline
8. Strive for Balance in Personal and Family Life

These values are interpreted in a variety of ways. Many attachment parents also choose to live a natural family living (NFL) lifestyle, such as natural childbirth, home birth, stay-at-home parenting, co-sleeping, breastfeeding, babywearing, homeschooling, unschooling, the anti-circumcision movement, natural health, cooperative movements,naturism and support of organic and local foods.

However, Dr. Sears does not require a parent to strictly follow any set of rules, instead encouraging parents to be creative in responding to their child's needs. Attachment parenting, outside the guise of Dr. Sears, focuses on responses that support secure attachments.

***

anyway. i thought dr. sears' H1N1 article gave a lot of relevant, useful information that i've not yet found elsewhere in such a concise manner. i hope it is helpful to you in making the decision whether or not to submit yourself and your family to this new vaccine.

"people pay for what they do, and still more, for what they have allowed themselves to become. and they pay for it simply: by the lives they lead."

-edith wharton

**********************

jessie daniel maize,

33% of my cousins,

catcher of crawdads, scaler of fences, flier of kites,

professional hamster breeder,

and conductor extraordinaire,

gone gently into that good night

nine years ago this winter.

i hope god supplies strawberry crush up there, cous.

**********************

"I'm really worried that he's going to kill someone else," Patti Tate said. "I'm really afraid it's going to happen again, if he doesn't change." Tulsa World, January 15, 2006

**********************

November 10, 1999

TR-1999-4842; traffic violation; dismissed.

December 9, 2000

Tahlequah man dies of traffic injuries; tested positive at the hospital for methamphetamine, then discharged. no charges filed.

March 5, 2002

TRC-02-941; traffic violation; guilty plea.

2003

Felony drug charge, possession of methamphetamine, dismissed and record expunged.

Misdemeanor driving under the influence; dismissed and record expunged without input from prosecutor.

August 11, 2004

PO-2004-0236; protective order; dismissed.

2004

Felony drug charge, possession of methamphetamine and paraphernalia, dismissed and record expunged.

Driving under the influence, probation received and record expunged.

Driving under suspension, probation received and record expunged.

Transporting a loaded firearm (Ruger pistol), probation received and record expunged.

January 15, 2006

Legal luck raises questions

January 19, 2006

Grandson of ex-politician will finally stand trial

January 21, 2006

Trial date set for grandson of ex-senator

February 25, 2006

Probation given ex-lawmaker's grandson

January 13, 2009

CM-09-38; public intoxication; charges pending.

February 20, 2009

CM-09-204; driving under the influence; charges pending.

September 8, 2009

TRC-09-1788; driving under suspension; charges pending.

TRC-09-1789; driving left of center; charges pending.

TRC-09-1790; no security verification; charges pending.

TRC-09-1791; failure to install or disconnect required ignition interlock device; charges pending.

September 24, 2009

TRC-09-1920: driving under suspension; charges pending.

and then today

October 16, 2009

Helicopter crash near Tahlequah leaves two dead

**********************

Wake

Tell all my mourners

To mourn in red--

Cause there ain't no sense

In my bein' dead.

-Langston Hughes

an open letter to my blog

hi, blog. how are you doing? i'm sorry i haven't been around here much the past few months. my life has just been very busy. i know that's no good excuse. after all, you're the way that i share my life with so many of my friends and family.

but it's just been crazy. first i wrecked my car, and then kitten had tubes in her ears again, and then we had the girl's birthday party. in between all of that J decided to take a new job within his company, so we had to go buy a car to replace the one that i wrecked. we bought a used prius and we're pretty excited about it. it smells strongly of cigarette smoke, but we're hoping to get it aired out well. and since it's J's commuter car, it was his call and he said it didn't bother him that much. it has a whole lot of miles but we got a really good price and we weren't really looking to buy a new car right now, anyway. circumstances just put us in that position.

and after all, the only thing more ecologically friendly than buying a hybrid car is buying a USED hybrid car.

work has been crazy too. things are going well in my practice, but it is very stressful being out on your own. you never know how much next month's paycheck will be, so i'm always thinking about account balances and payments and ten trillion other financial things. and you know i hate math.

as you know, blog, i used to love sitting on the computer in the evenings. i'd watch tv and surf the internet, edit photographs and post them, and write blogs. it was a creative outlet for me.

but lately, i've become really averse to technology. the last thing i want to do in the evenings is be on the computer. i'm not really watching much tv anymore, either. on fridays i dutifully pack up my laptop to bring it home for the weekend, but i really don't even care anymore. it barely makes it out of my briefcase most of the time.

because having a toddler is tiring, blog! where i used to spend my evenings and weekends cooking and watching my favorite shows and movies and going out to dinner with J and hanging out with friends, now i do laundry. lots of laundry.

and picking up toys. blocks. plastic shapes. flutes. balls. noise makers. baby dolls. puzzle pieces. my ankles are worse for the wear.

and giving of baths. and laying out of clothes for the next day. and packing lunches. and doing dishes. and paying bills. OH the bills.

and when it's all done, it's an accomplishment if i have the energy to take a shower and blow dry my hair instead of just going to bed with it wet and then it sticks out insanely the next day like winona ryder's character lydia deetz in beetlejuice.

and interestingly, as i've receded from electronics, i find i've been picking up my old books more. just in the last week i've read john fowles' "The French Lieutenant's Woman," and re-read his first effort, "The Collector."

the point is, blog, i think i've overextended myself with my online obligations. too many social networking sites, too many message boards, too much virtual interaction. i can't keep up with it all. i need to pare down. the effort to streamline my social information so that it goes 10 places at once and reaches everyone with no effort has instead resulted in way too many websites that i have to log into each day and check. as a result, i don't log into any of them at all. and then i'm feeling guilty because i haven't posted pictures of the girls' birthday party yet, but that's because i haven't photoshopped them yet, and that's because they're still in the freaking camera because instead of photoshopping pictures of them i'd rather BE with them and then after that i just want to ... sleep?

but don't worry, blog. i'm not going to abandon you. i just need to take a little bit more of a break. i'll be back.

when the chaos subsides, this sheep will return to the fold.