conversations with god

this week the oklahoma legislature overrode governor brad henry's veto of two abortion measures, which means the measures took immediate effect.

one of the bills requires women to undergo an ultrasound and listen to a detailed description of the fetus before getting an abortion. the other measure prohibits pregnant women from seeking damages if physicians withhold information or provide inaccurate information about their pregnancy.

this isn't going to be a blog about the pro-choice vs. pro-life debate. i've thought long and hard about that issue, and since there's no chapter on gestational age and the soul in the bible, i went straight to the source and asked god when the soul enters a fetus. he in his infinite wisdom replied, "[silence]."

now i could be wrong, but unless stephen hawking has created some magical telephone to the afterlife available only to the pope and planned parenthood and the oklahoma legislature, then i'm pretty sure that everyone has received the same response from the almighty: nada. so i'm not interested in discussing the right or wrong of it with anyone who doesn't have irrefutable proof, and until then, i'm not taking part in the abortion debate--and frankly, i don't think anyone else should be debating it, either, except between themselves and god. who won't answer, by the way. frustrating, no?

but back to these bills. what i find interesting--and i don't like to generalize about the right or the left because i myself am all over the place--but what i find interesting is that the same people who are vehemently protesting obama's "death panels" regarding physician guidance on end-of-life discussions are the same ones who are supporting the oklahoma legislature's required physician guidance on end-of-pregnancy discussions.

now, wait. what? you can't have it both ways. either the government is in the exam room, or they aren't. you can't pick and choose to suit your cause.

i'm appalled that the legislature thinks it's okay to dictate how doctors communicate with their clients. these requirements that doctors engage abortion patients in lengthy conversations about the fetus so that women can be "informed" about their choice to end a pregnancy: where is the requirement that doctors engage pregnancy patients in lengthy conversations about the cost of raising a child to adulthood, and carbon footprints, so that a woman can be "informed" about their choice to carry a pregnancy to term? the whole concept is woefully imbalanced. women can inform themselves just fine.

i mean, what's next?

before we can perform your hysterectomy to save you from potentially fatal cancer we are required by law to count how many viable eggs you are going to be throwing away as medical waste, and we have to show it to you on an ultrasound and read you this script drafted by your state legislature.

before we can perform your masectomy to we are required by law to show you a film about why it's best to breastfeed your baby so that you are fully aware of all potential drawbacks to this procedure recommended by your oncologist.

does the legislature think we're all idiots??

and i think it's even more abhorrent that this legislation allows doctors to outright lie to their patients about the condition of their pregnancy if the physician thinks that the information might cause a woman to seek an abortion. are you insane, oklahoma legislature??? i can't even communicate how repugnant this premise is. that's barbaric.

the bottom line for me: the government shouldn't be placing ANY requirements on how doctors talk to their patients - about life, death, or anything in between. and it shouldn't protect doctors from lying or misleading patients about real medical issues. these things should be left to the oklahoma and american medical associations who have actual medical knowledge--not just a bunch of morally ambiguous suits up at the capitol lunching on smoked salmon and making judgments about the decision-making abilities of intelligent adults they've never met.

i hope all of you understand how important it is that this legislation be overturned - and it will, it's blatantly unconstitutional. this has nothing to do with whether or not abortions are immoral or criminal, and everything to do with interfering in the doctor/patient relationship. the implications of this legislation are far-reaching: i'm not planning to seek an abortion, but i am planning to have another baby at some point, and this legislation allows my doctor to arbitrarily withhold crucial information from me about my pregnancy and the health of my unborn child.

EVERYONE should be frightened by this.

garlic-ancho chile shredded chicken

do this, you won't regret it. beginning to end time: 25 minutes.

ingredients:
4 chicken breasts
4 cloves garlic
2 dried ancho chiles
ground cumin
1 can tomato paste
salt, sugar
bunch of fresh cilantro, or not, or dried oregano

for serving:
corn or flour tortillas or polenta
sour cream
shredded red cabbage

how:
place chicken breasts in large pan and cover with 1.5 cups of water. throw in garlic cloves (peeled, whole) and a pinch of salt and a handful of roughly chopped cilantro. or not. or use dried oregano. cover. simmer 10-15 minutes until chicken breasts are cooked through.

meanwhile, remove the stem and seeds from two small or one large dried ancho chile. find a package of them for a buck fifty in the mexican spice section of your grocery - commonly labeled "chile mulato." they last forever in your pantry. don't be afraid. put the dried chiles in a large glass bowl.

when chicken is cooked through, remove breasts from pan and set aside. pour boiling hot cooking broth into glass bowl with chiles and let them soak for 10 minutes while you shred the chicken breasts with two forks.

add to cooking broth and chiles: 1 can tomato paste, 2 teaspoons ground cumin, 1 teaspoon sugar, and a few large pinches of kosher salt. use immersion blender to create sauce. or put it in your blender, or food processor. whatevs.

pour sauce over shredded chicken* and combine.

serve in corn tortillas or over fresh polenta (or in flour tortillas if that's your thing but you have to know that flour tortillas aren't nearly as good) with shredded red cabbage, diced green onion, and a dollop of sour cream.

*set aside a serving of unsauced, garlic-poached chicken for the kiddos. the ancho chile sauce is just the teeniest bit spicy.

pictures not available because i'm lame with my camera these days. well, not the camera so much as the computer. i never bring it home so the pictures never make it out of my camera. other things you're missing: Easter, playing in the water hose, Aislinn's first encounter with toad. useless pixels on a flash memory card.

boundaries

aislinn is a handful. saturday morning autumn was feeling a little under the weather, so she was lying on the couch sipping a glass of water. aislinn toddled over to the coffee table, picked up the glass of water, and poured it right on autumn's lap. autumn burst into tears and aislinn thought it was hilarious.

who is this child?

she WILL NOT leave the dog dishes alone. over and over and OVER i have to get onto her. erin suggested that i just let her eat the dog food, that she wouldn't like it and then she'd leave it alone, but that hasn't worked. she just squats there by the bowls, picks up a piece of dog food, dips it into the water, and feeds it to the dog. or herself.

on saturday, after the water incident, she had her first "time out." i realize that she's too young to understand time out, but i feel like i have to do something. i put her in the corner and stood there for a minute or so. she was utterly unaffected. she thought it was funny. she's not old enough to understand consequences yet, but i guess i have to start somewhere.

a few minutes later found her sitting on the couch hitting her baby doll and saying, "no, no!" i don't understand this at all. she's started hitting to get your attention and we've been swift to discourage this behavior. so i don't know if she was telling her baby doll, "no," or whether she was saying "no" to herself as she hit the doll. either way it was disturbing to me.

then a few minutes later i walked past the "time out"spot and there was her baby doll. i wanted to cry, but why?

we're not a yelling household, and we don't swat. the most i've ever done is slap her hand when she's done something dangerous. so seeing her engage in this sort of role play with her baby doll upset me. i feel like i'm firm with her, jake doesn't think i'm firm enough. i think he overestimates her capacity to understand cause and effect; i think he underestimates it. i think she's just exploring her boundaries and not intentionally being "bad;" he thinks she's acting out and needs to be disciplined.

it's a hard age. her vocabulary is expansive and her curiosity is incessant. she's not afraid of anything. she's the polar opposite of her sister, who embraces rules and feels comforted by boundaries.

she's putting together little two- and three-word sentences. she doesn't want to be rocked before bed anymore. she puts her shoes on by herself. i tried to get her to nap with me on sunday and she wouldn't have it - all she wanted to do was talk about the dog. what happened to my cuddly baby? it's such a big world and she's so eager to be out in it. STOP! DANGER! PELIGROSO, MY DARLING!

18 month check-up

kitten had her 18-month check-up today. her percentiles are as follows:

head: 46cm (50%)

height: 31 7/8" (50%)

weight: 21.5lbs (15%)

so clearly she's still a skinny minnie, which isn't too surprising since most of her food ends up on the floor. she's developing some picky eating habits, much to my chagrin. i thought i'd just expose her to a wide variety of foods from an early age and problem solved! yeah not so much. but she's following right along the growth curve, and her percentiles are still about the same as when she was born, so no worries.

in the waiting room

we had shots today. she was MAD, but settled down almost as soon as i picked her up and wiped away her tears of indignation. i set her on my lap to redress her, and she carefully patted the band-aids on her thighs through her pants and muttered, "uh-oh. uh-oh." which put a lump in my throat. i wanted to take her home and snuggle her for the rest of the day, but by the time we reached the parking lot she had forgotten all about it, distracted by her strawberry shortcake sticker.

have i ever mentioned that she is the absolute love of my life?

17 months old

skillz

kitten having an after-school snack with aunt erin, yesterday:

sometimes i wish i were gay

does that sound weird? i guess so.

but seriously, it would be so nice to spend all of my time with someone who actually shared most - or even some - of my interests. instead of jake who hates my short haircut even though i love it, and never notices what color my nails are painted, and likes to window shop at best buy, and watches Tim & Eric's Awesome Show and owns rifles.

several years back i mused to my very good (and gay) friend jeremy, wow, it must be convenient to be gay.

i mean, think about it:

honey, this evening, let's go get pedicures. and then let's stop by Sephora because i want to get a new scrubbing face wash. and then we can go see a chick flick and pour reese's pieces into our popcorn and drown it in extra butter because i have pms and i know you understand my need for extra butter. and tomorrow i'm going to go get a haircut and go even shorter this time because i know you won't judge me for cutting off my very long, very high maintenance, very hot and itchy long locks that i had when we met that were perpetually up in chopsticks because i couldn't stand it.

but i guess that's what friends are for, right?

i need more girl time.